pull together

Pulling Together from Remote Locations!

What happens when Mom is declining in health, but the kids live remotely? Is this a deal breaker? For some families, the answer is yes. The kids feel that they live too far away from their parents and that there is little or nothing they can do to help. Others, however, rise to the challenge! They pull together as a family unit and make a plan that will work for Mom and for each of them.

The Key is Willingness

Starting last year with the Covid onslaught and continuing until today, we are doing several Zoom (or Google Meet) calls a week with family members who all live a distance from each other and from their declining parents – yet are making good things happen in spite of the miles.

What’s the difference between the families who throw in the towel before getting started vs. the families who work to make it happen? The answer seems to be just a willingness to work together to make it happen.

Zoom, Google and other marvels of modern technology empower families, who are willing to pull together, to make a difference for their parents.

Different Actions – Same Result

The actions that the family will take vary a lot from family to family, based on the particular situation. For example:

  1. Some families will work together with local family members. Some families have local family members who are able or willing to help. These families coordinate their efforts with the remote family members doing everything that can be done remotely while the local family members provide hands-on care.
  2. Some will hire non-medical caregivers. For families that don’t have available local family members, then non medical care may be a great option in situations where the declining parent is able and willing to remain at home with some assistance.
  3. Some hire local care managers to coordinate the care. For the declining parent is home or in a facility, some geographically remote families hire life care planners, nurses or geriatric care managers to have a local online third-party presence to help supervise the care.
  4. Some move Mom to their location. In situations where the parent is willing to move, some of these geographically remote family members will decide as a family to move Mom closer to them. In these situations Mom may physically live in the home with them or may live in a local assisted living or independent living facility.
  5. Some consider facility care. In situations where Mom needs full time skilled nursing care, the decision may be made to move the declining parent to a local Assisted Living Facility or Skilled Nursing Facility.

The end result is that at the end of the day, they will have designed a plan that will create some stability in the family dynamic and reduce the stress in their lives measurably.

A Caregiver Community that Loves to Pull Together!

We fully understand the stress and turmoil that you are facing as Family Caregiver – including personal experiences with burnout.

In our time as caregivers, we have amassed a wealth of knowledge that we desire to pass on. Likewise, we have met many professional caregivers, as well as other family members who were thrust as Family Caregiver. All caregivers have shared the same advice – Join a community! There is nothing more cleansing for our situation than knowing that we are not alone!

We have since created Caregiver Connection. Caregiver Connection is a newsletter that we write personally and send to fellow Caregivers. It is full of tips, tricks, and even professional advice. If you would like to sign up, click the button below.

Please Invite Someone to Our Newsletter

Being a member of the sandwich generation can be a scary, frustrating and lonely place lacking stability. You feel like you are solely responsible for solving Mom’s problems while managing yours. Some occasional input and a community to plug into would help, especially when facing burnout! This is a way that all of us can be working together as caregivers!

Many others that you may personally know are having to figure it all out by themselves. Most of them have no community. Please take a minute and do them a favor. Copy this link – help.mom/cc – and send it to them in an email or private message. They can click on it and subscribe to our newsletter for free.

Then they can enjoy weekly tips and encouragement. They no longer have to feel so alone in their family caregiver journey. They will appreciate the favor! Thank you for thinking of them!

Thank You for being a Caregiver for Your Loved One – you are making a huge difference in their life!

About the Author

Doug & his wife Cindy have not only helped hundreds of families with their estate planning and elder law needs over the years, but have personal experience as caregivers and advocates for their Loved Ones as well.

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